A time to every purpose

A lot of you know already by now but I thought I'd put a post up because I know a few of you read my blog that I haven't spoken to.

Last weekend I miscarried very suddenly. On Thursday night I had a very small problem-indicator, and thought it was probably nothing, but I called my doctor on Friday and they told me they wanted me to come in just so we could make sure and so I wouldn't have to worry over the weekend. I went in and the doctor did an ultrasound, and we didn't see a heartbeat. He measured the baby and there hadn't been very much growth since the last time I had an ultrasound, so we were very sure that it was over. We talked about what options I had for getting the baby out, but he told me to come back the following week and we'd make a plan.

Friday night so many people came and offered support and love and it was a great comfort to us. Much to my surprise, at about 3:00am Saturday morning I woke up with horrible cramps that were actually the beginning of labor. My doctor had told me that I would be able to pass it at home, but by 4:00am I was in so much pain that Michael took me to the hospital. When we got there they gave me lots of pain-killers, and the ER doctor assisted in easing the "blood clot" out. They did an ultrasound to make sure that there wasn't any remaining tissue and then they had me go home.

Everything happened very suddenly: I found out there was a problem on Friday afternoon, and 14 hours later my baby wasn't even inside of me anymore. I have actually felt lucky that I had the chance to see my doctor on Friday afternoon to learn the news and have some time to think about it before everything happened at 3:00am. I've been on lots of painkillers since I left the hospital, as my body is still shedding the uteran lining and cramps are killing me, but we're hoping that by the end of the week I'll be having less pain and I can do more physically.

One thing I want people to know for sure is that I don't regret at all telling people that I was pregnant so early. I think it would have been such a waste to not celebrate this baby's life for the short time that it was here, and we have felt so much support from those close to us in these past few days. Also, I'm perfectly fine with answering people's questions and talking about what happened; I really would rather not pretend like this didn't happen, and at least for me it has been therapeutic to talk about it. Many thanks to all our friends and family who have been so supportive. We are so grateful for all of the prayers said on our behalf, and have felt overwhelming comfort and love from them.

omg 8 weeks

I never thought I would make it, but it's finally here! After two week 7s, Hurrah!

Week 7... again.

Thursday marked week 7 for me, for a second time.

Last week I thought I was week 7. But when I went to the doctor on Monday, he measured the baby to get the exact due date (and alternatively, exactly how far along I was). He said, "Oh. Well we thought you were 7 weeks and 4 days along. But it actually looks like you're 6 weeks and 4 days along..."

As per the rule, he measured twice (but didn't even cut once, thank goodness), and it was confirmed: 6 weeks 4 days. So I get to re-live week 7. Hurrah.

My thoughts so far: week 7 sucks.

Our blob

I have a blob! And hopefully that blob will turn into a baby. It's still a bit early to tell people, but mostly family read this blog, and I will probably just end up telling people whether it works out or not. Anyway, this was taken yesterday, and I like to think that my baby is lifting up a little flapper to wave and say, "Hi, Mommy!"

The baby is the little white bean-area inside the dark black area. When the doctor showed it to me, there was a little area inside of the white bean that went black-white, black-white, black-white, black-white! So cool!

I'm due the first week of June next year if everything works out.